Suicides Prevention: Our teens
Suicide is a complicated issue with no simple answers. It is an area where mental and social health intersect. Whether a suicide is the result of
poor mental health (untreated depression, etc.) or poor social health (being
bullied for example), we need to be able to help our young people learn better coping
skills. We need to teach resiliency and inner strength, as well as how to be honest when things are not going well.
The television shows and movies the 20-year-olds watched as kids (Spy Kids, Rugrats, Dragon Tails) often showed them to rely first and foremost on themselves, as there were frequently no parents around to help them. It was a direct reflection of the 60’s attitude of you cannot trust anyone over 30. As a result, they don’t talk over the daily stresses of life with parents, teachers, or counselors who can help them to see new solutions or into the future when their problems won’t even bother them.
Finding ways to teach our kids good social skills is necessary for their good mental health, as well. Some key things we can teach kids, and work on ourselves, are learning to apologize, practicing random acts of kindness, reaching out to our friends and learning not to fear asking for that hug or shoulder to cry on that they sometimes want and need.
So often our kids see failure or loss as a permanent thing. That this one moment of incompetency would define them for the rest of their life. Breaking up with this guy (or girl) will guarantee they never date again.
While there are many reasons for this, one of the contributing factors is this new idea that we don't keep score when playing sports. The theory is that not keeping score helps children to have better self-esteem. But the reality is that this behavior fails to teach kids so much. When we don't keep score, we fail to teach kids that losing is okay. We fail to teach kids that hard work and practice can make us better. That just because we lost last week, doesn't mean we will lose this week. We build resiliency. optimism, and the ethic of hard work into our students when we keep score.
One of the ways we can help kids learn this lesson now is to go back to playing board games. When you lose in a video game, your character often dies. That feeds the concept that failure is permanent. But board games let you lose and then play again. And there are so many fun ones. Have you seen all the new ones like Babble On or Speakout that require no skills or special knowledge?
Not a game player? Then work on improving social skills. Friends help you see the world in a positive manner. They can be your biggest cheerleaders. Make new friends by smiling and say something nice to three people a day. Write a note to a neighbor, family member, or shut-in that expresses something positive about them.
Use social media to connect to others. Use a silly Facebook picture or LinkedIn’s pre-written “Congrats on your new job,” to start out. But make it a goal to write something from your own heart about each person.
Imagine a world where people are friendly that on a regular basis—social unrest, suicides, and homicides rates would come down as we learned to love and accept each other.
The television shows and movies the 20-year-olds watched as kids (Spy Kids, Rugrats, Dragon Tails) often showed them to rely first and foremost on themselves, as there were frequently no parents around to help them. It was a direct reflection of the 60’s attitude of you cannot trust anyone over 30. As a result, they don’t talk over the daily stresses of life with parents, teachers, or counselors who can help them to see new solutions or into the future when their problems won’t even bother them.
Finding ways to teach our kids good social skills is necessary for their good mental health, as well. Some key things we can teach kids, and work on ourselves, are learning to apologize, practicing random acts of kindness, reaching out to our friends and learning not to fear asking for that hug or shoulder to cry on that they sometimes want and need.
So often our kids see failure or loss as a permanent thing. That this one moment of incompetency would define them for the rest of their life. Breaking up with this guy (or girl) will guarantee they never date again.
While there are many reasons for this, one of the contributing factors is this new idea that we don't keep score when playing sports. The theory is that not keeping score helps children to have better self-esteem. But the reality is that this behavior fails to teach kids so much. When we don't keep score, we fail to teach kids that losing is okay. We fail to teach kids that hard work and practice can make us better. That just because we lost last week, doesn't mean we will lose this week. We build resiliency. optimism, and the ethic of hard work into our students when we keep score.
One of the ways we can help kids learn this lesson now is to go back to playing board games. When you lose in a video game, your character often dies. That feeds the concept that failure is permanent. But board games let you lose and then play again. And there are so many fun ones. Have you seen all the new ones like Babble On or Speakout that require no skills or special knowledge?
Not a game player? Then work on improving social skills. Friends help you see the world in a positive manner. They can be your biggest cheerleaders. Make new friends by smiling and say something nice to three people a day. Write a note to a neighbor, family member, or shut-in that expresses something positive about them.
Use social media to connect to others. Use a silly Facebook picture or LinkedIn’s pre-written “Congrats on your new job,” to start out. But make it a goal to write something from your own heart about each person.
Imagine a world where people are friendly that on a regular basis—social unrest, suicides, and homicides rates would come down as we learned to love and accept each other.
No comments:
Post a Comment